The "per Du" ritual

Another element which characterises the German culture in my eyes is the way to address someone. In principle, adults address each other with the formal form of “you” (which does not exist in English), “Sie” in German. Not so difficult, so far. Difficult is the question when to change from the formal to the informal “you” (“Du” in German; people that use this form are called to be “per Du” with each other).
As a Dutch, I was used to address my Dutch colleagues at work informally, almost regardless of age or hierarchical level. So, having to address my German colleagues in this formal way, felt a bit awkward for me in the beginning. After a while I got used to it, but I haven't really developed a feeling for the moment the formal form can be swapped for the informal yet.

If there is one at all, the rule pretty much follows the Chinese Confucian principle: the elder person can offer the younger person to use the informal “you”, but the person higher in hierarchy can offer his subordinates the informal form, regardless of the age difference. I don’t know who is to offer the “Du” form, between a man and a woman of equal age, on the same hierarchical level.
Of course, nowadays, pragmatic ways are used more and more, and the trend is definitely towards the informal form, especially amongst younger people. But still, the ritual is still there, especially in the more conservative and traditional companies.

Always a good occasion to ‘promote’ your relationship with senior colleagues to the informal level is an overnight business trip to a remote location, like the one I was on during the past two days. After a few drinks and a few jokes, the atmosphere is optimal for the “per Du” ritual. I have to admit, the whole thing does have a certain charm to it.